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| Stopping for a photo in front of the castle! |
Training for a marathon with three children aged 4 and under is easy. I truthfully couldn't dedicate the time that I now know is essential. Not only that, but eating well is hit or miss as a mom of young kids and my diet was not the least bit appropriate for marathon training. However, I needed to do something to show myself how far I had come since the days of having twin infants. I needed a goal that didn't involve feeding children or kissing boo boos. I hated running at the time but I also knew it was something I could do easily without spending much money and without having to drive anywhere for a class. Plus, my husband and brother in law had started running marathons and since I am a competitive Type A woman, I couldn't accept being outdone by two boys who had never grown a human in their bodies. No offense men, I'm just sayin. So off I went on my crusade to become a runner.
If you know me at all you'll know that one of my biggest soapbox topics is postpartum care in the US. It's totally unacceptable in many cases. I am a Pelvic Health PT, so I know better, but most women get NO instruction on their postpartum bodies. Because I'm a PT I am also the worst kind of patient. I'm non-compliant and totally lazy, unlike most of my patients who actually do their homework. I didn't do much of anything to prepare for running besides, well, running. I had some pain in my buttocks here and there and some incontinence during my training but honestly, I just didn't care. I think I had struggled so much with stress and postpartum depression over the past few years that peeing on myself didn't seem like a big deal compared to taking care of kids.
On race day at Disney it was muggy and hot and we had been up for hours in order to get the starting line on time. We had walked a long way from the shuttle to the corral and adrenaline had been flooding through me all morning - not really ideal for my body which is typically already full of stress chemicals. By mile 7 I was losing control of my bladder. Whenever I would slow down to walk (which was VERY often) I would leak urine. By mile 9 or 10 I was already uncontrollably peeing on myself. The benefit there is no porta john lines, but still.
I struggled to get through the race. I was SO hot and had 11 blisters on my feet. I was soaking wet from sweat and pee. The high of crossing the finish line was unreal, despite my urine shoes. But the fact is that I should never have been at the point where I was just peeing on myself for miles and miles. It's not the least bit normal or okay.
For my second marathon, the Outer Banks Marathon, I trained smarter and ran solo. I ate better and made time for Yoga. I tried working on my abdominal, hip, and back strength. I PR'ed this race and felt amazing through it. Then came my third.
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| Outer Banks! |
I don't know why I wanted to do another one. I suppose many runners can attest to that need to prove yourself faster. I ran the Wrightsville Beach Marathon this past March because it's close to home and we have a beach house nearby. I stuck to my training schedule, ate well, but even so my body just wasn't feeling it. I had major pain in my buttocks and down my legs every time I ran. My back ached literally all the time. I couldn't walk in the mornings when I first got up so I sort of threw myself forward into the bathroom holding onto the walls until a hot shower helped me stand up straight. I ran the race in pain. Major pain. Annoyingly enough, at first it wasn't even my "normal pain." I had put a tampon in that morning (because nothing is more awesome when you are trying to run 26.2 miles than menstruating at the same time) and within the first two miles I was having rectal pain. Yes, literally pain in my butt. I knew why - I'm a Pelvic Health PT and all - so I knew my pelvic floor muscles were tightening because they didn't like the tampon in there at that moment. Nevertheless, I persisted. At mile 7 I stopped at a toilet and yanked it out, texting Ashley (my PT Best Friend) cuss words and whines about my pelvic floor woes. The good news is that the rectal pain went away when I took out my tampon. The bad news is that my back and leg pain presented itself immediately because now my brain could feel it since my bum was happier. Hurray.
I almost quit this race. My daughter had started vomiting at 3am the night before, our car broke down, and there was a chance my family wasn't going to make it to the finish line. I was over it, but I had a college friend who was biking to various points along the route cheering for me which pulled me through. The pain was excruciating and basically debilitating and I cried a few times toward mile 20 because it was awful, even with me popping Tylenol during the run. I crossed the finish line only 15 minutes behind my PR which was super surprising to me. Even so, I could hardly move for three full days, something that isn't normal even after a marathon, at least not if your body is working well. My brother in law pointed out after the race that I actually ran it injured, and that was the first ever time I had ever thought of it that way. I was injured.
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| Wrightsville Beach Marathon |
I have run maybe a couple of miles a handful of times since that race but there is pain. I am 5 years postpartum from my youngest babies and the lack of care of my body has finally caught up to me. It took some time for my diastasis to cause me problems (for more about my Diastasis read this blog post), for my pelvic floor weakness to cause pain, but now here I am - fairly broken because of some of my postpartum issues even though I am years past my delivery. My Cesarean scar still needs some TLC, my abdominals need retraining, my pelvic floor is still very weak. Had I done something for myself after my twins were born I can almost guarantee I would not have peed for an entire marathon all the way down into my shoes. I can pretty much assume I would be running my fourth marathon soon. Instead I am feeling more dysfunctional with every week that passes. I am on my friend Ashley's schedule at the end of the month to get some PT of my own. I am going to spend some time diligently trying to get my body back into a functional place. It's going to take some time, but I love the idea of running a few more marathons. I want to run a big city one like Chicago or NYC. I want to run one when I turn 40. I want to show my girls that our bodies do incredible things and that hard work pays off.
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| Me and my father in law at the finish line of the Ft. Bragg 10-Miler last year. |
If PT were the standard of care following childbirth (which let's be honest, is MUCH HARDER on our bodies than running a marathon), I would be in a better place. I am so excited when new moms take it upon themselves to come in for PT in the early postpartum time frame. They are so much ahead of the game. They understand how to move well, how to work out safely, how to keep themselves healthy. They prevent this gradual breaking down of the body that I am dealing with at the moment. I knew better, but I didn't take the time. It's easier not to. I'm paying for it now, but I'll be okay. I am going to take it slow and figure some things out. I am going to take some time to allow my body to move well again. My body is very different than it was before I had children, and I am totally okay with that. However, I need to learn to use this new and beautiful body well. I am excited to see what Ashley helps me find that needs work and to see if I can get things working better. It's definitely nice having a best friend who also does what I do and can get me back to running. I can't wait to hit the pavement again for something more than a short painful jaunt around the block. Ladies, mothers: we don't have to live this way. We can change how postpartum care is delivered in our country if we would just talk about this. Share this with your girlfriends, your daughters. Tell them there is help and hope and something so much cheaper than having to buy new shoes every time you run. Don't go squishing around in urine shoes like me. Find a PT and give your body the gift of moving well.
Dr. Lacy Kells PT, DPT
The Physio Down Low @ Advanced Physical Therapy Solutions
910-423-5350
lacy.kells@aptsnc.com
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and Instagram @lacykellspt
